C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
so explain again why im purple
no
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
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