good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
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