Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
Randomize
