The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
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