So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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