tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize