If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize