I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
So apparently I’m into choking now
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