It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
how drunk are you?
Several
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize