Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
bring money and cleavage
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize