I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
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