my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
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