No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize
