I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize