I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Randomize
