I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
