Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
