It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize
