did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Randomize
