Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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