If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Randomize
