did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
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