This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
She's the barista slut.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Randomize
