Whoa Z and x make the same sound
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
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