i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
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