I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
I forget how to act sober
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize