But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
