I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
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he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
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I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
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