I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Randomize
