We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
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