the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Randomize
