So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Randomize