Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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