So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize