people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
