I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Randomize