i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
