new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
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