Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Randomize