Im at strip club and am horny
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
I should be sponsored by Trojan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
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