whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
