just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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