went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
I want to be your penis for a week.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
