I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize