were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
