you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
Randomize