I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
You took a bar mat shot.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
