And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize