I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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