he puts the penis in happiness.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I want to be your penis for a week.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
