ugly people sure do ruin things
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
